Bullying in Schools: Responses, Remedies & Recommendations

Rev. Fr. Dr. Joe Mariadhas, Director
Shalom Rehabilitation Centre
Chumukedima - Nagaland

The news item that appeared in our dailies on the topic “Is school bullying taken seriously in Nagaland?” has inspired me to write this article. I don’t really know how many of us have read this news item and what is our response or feeling towards it. It has made to think deeply that has enabled me bring out some reflections on this above mentioned topic that needs attention and action to prevent and promote healthy behavior patterns in  our schools rather than becoming victims of modern day crisis of bullying in schools that takes place in many other cities. We need to understand that our kids are passing through a period of transition that anything attractive draws their attention and thus lead them into this type of problematic behaviors exhibited in the schools.

What is bullying? 

Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior among school aged children that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. The behavior is repeated, or has the potential to be repeated, over time. Bullying includes actions such as making threats, spreading rumors, attacking someone physically or verbally, and excluding someone from a group on purpose.

Bullying is when someone intimidates or causes harm to another person on purpose. The victims of bullying can be verbally, physically or emotionally assaulted and are often threatened and made to feel frightened.

Bullying is intentional aggressive behavior. It can take the form of physical or verbal harassment and involves an imbalance of power (a group of children can gang up on a victim or someone who is physically bigger or more aggressive can intimidate someone else, for instance).

These definitions tell us that it affects students’ life in all aspects. Bullying can threaten students’ physical and emotional safety at school and can negatively impact their ability to learn. Behaviors that are traditionally considered bullying among school-aged youth often require new attention and strategies in young adults and college students. Many of these behaviors are considered crimes under law and may trigger serious consequences after the age of 18.

A child who is bullying others often has problems of his or her own. Try to understand what may be causing this behavior and think about what is going on in your own home. Bullying can be subtle, so watch your child’s behavior closely. Bullying should not be viewed as an unfortunate but unavoidable part of school life. No child deserves to be bullied - it's unacceptable behavior and can have a devastating effect on the victim. To sum up the definitions, “bullying is a pervasive type of aggression, which often occurs in schools. As with other types of aggression, the harm that is inflicted – whether physical, emotional or both – is intentional.”

Types of Bullying

Physical: Physical bullying is any unwanted physical contact between the bully and the victim. This is one of the most easily identifiable forms of bullying. Punching, pushing, kicking, inappropriate, touching, tickling, school pranks, teasing, fighting, use of available objects  as weapons that could be taken for granted at times not knowing the serious harm it does to an individual. 

Emotional: Emotional bullying is any form of harm or damage caused to a victim that affects his psychological and emotional well being. Examples like, spreading malicious rumours, formation of small gangs or groups and keeping certain people out of that group, making fun of certain persons, ignoring someone who really needs attentions, some form of harassment, provocations and saying hurting sentences and making one to become very vulnerable to different comments and so on. 

Verbal: Verbal bullying is any slanderous statements or accusations that cause the victim undue emotional distress. Examples like commenting negatively on someone's looks, clothes, body etc., being laughed at, directing foul languages and using profane words, teasing and tormenting and making the person to cry or shun from the common place and so on. 

There are also many other types of bullying that occurs in places like cyber bullying and sexual bullying. Bullying is delivered in a number of different forms and is not limited to one gender. Bullying covers a wide range of age groups but is particularly prominent between the ages of 9–18. Boys tend to do more bullying than girls, especially in the form of physical bullying. However girls usually tend to bully in verbal forms and also tend to feel guilty after doing it. Understanding is the key to address this issue. 

In a research conducted in the Unites States, according to the American Psychological Association, approximately "40% to 80% of school-age children experience bullying at some point during their school careers". Regardless of the grade level, socioeconomic environment, gender, religion, or sexual orientation, bullying can happen to anyone. However, various studies point out that students from lower socio-economic backgrounds are more bullied than students from higher socio-economic backgrounds. 

Bullying may be a common occurrence in most schools and most children may experience bullying at some point in their academic careers. Does that mean our children need to pass through these ordeals or can we prevent from happening? In developed societies it could occur and they have mechanisms to address these issues but are we prepared to address them? What have we done? What is our reaction and response to these children who have been bullied and never managed to tell or bring it out to the authority for action? 

According to Tara Kuther, associate professor of psychology at Western Connecticut State University, "...bullying gets so much more sophisticated and subtle….It's more relational. It becomes more difficult for teens to know when to intervene, and the author goes on to state that whereas with younger kids bullying is more physical and therefore more clear cut actions can be taken.

Signs and Symptoms of Bullying:

Verifying the signs that signify bullying characteristics are slightly harder than expected. They are usually viewed as loud and assertive and may even be hostile in particular situations. Bullies are not usually the largest kid in a class, but may be part of the popular or cool kids group or their own friends with whom they play and study together. There are many roles that children can play. Children can bully others, they can be bullied, or they may witness bullying. When kids are involved in bullying, they often play more than one role. It is important to understand the multiple roles kids play in order to effectively prevent and respond to bullying. As we know it is very subtle to be indentified unless the victim reports it. We may notice some changes in the behavior of the child. 

• child will say many excuses for not completing the homework
• unwillingness to go to school
• feeling unwell, often with a headache or other forms of physical illness
• irritability, aggressive or outbursts
• anxiety
• aggression towards everyone and family members
• bedwetting and nail biting
• waking in the night and not able to sleep, nightmares
• sudden change of moods or mood swings
• missing or damage to belongings
• crying spells
• restless, overactive or inactive
• withdrawn, exhibits fear or phobia
• self talk and deep thinking
• not very open to talk on any subject

Short-term and long-term effects of bullying:

We can come to know from experiences and researches that many have been affected by bullying for life long. Medical department suggest some of the following as effects of bullying. Like depression, suicidal ideation or intention, feeling unwanted and not finding meaning to live, anxiety, anger significant drop in school performance, feeling as if their life is over and cannot repair and excessive stress that lead to mental health issues and so on. Some of the long term effects are constant feelings of insecurity, lack of trust, extreme sensitivity, vengeance and mental illness such as psychotic or neurotic and lifelong medication to deal with these. Those who have become victims of bullying if not intervened at an earlier stage it could be fatal too.

Some Remedial Measures: 

1. Become aware of what is happening to the children – keep constant communication.
2. Talk to them about bullying especially when children are shifted to a new school.
3. Recognize that bullying can occur in any school at any time. So be prepared. 
4. Hold conferences to educate the parents and students on this issue. 
5. Increase adult supervision in the yard, halls and washrooms more vigilantly.
6. Emphasize caring, respect and safety and the consequences of hurting others.
7. Enforce consistent and immediate action for aggressive behaviors and make sure that no one repeats it. 
8. Improve the communication between school authorities, teachers and parents. 
9. Get suggestions from parents who are dealing with their children effectively. 
10. Teach social learning activities, team building, personality development lessons, and other learning activities. 
11. Have a school problem box where kids can report problems, concerns and offer suggestions.
12. Encourage positive peer relations and offer a variety of extracurricular activities which appeal to a range of interests of your children. 
13. Teach children to become aware of what is bullying and how to defend themselves. 
14. Healthy peer relationships to be promoted while gangs and other forms of groups to be avoided. 
15. Educate teachers on bullying to take appropriate interventions on time.

Bullying: Prevention at School 

1. Assess school prevention and intervention efforts around student behavior, including substance use and violence.
2. Conduct assessments in your school to determine how often bullying occurs, where it happens, how students and adults intervene, and whether your prevention efforts are working.
3. Launch an awareness campaign to make the objectives known to the school, parents, and community members. Establish a school safety committee or task force to plan, implement, and evaluate your school's bullying prevention program.
4. Let it be known to everyone clearly that the school does not tolerate any type of bullying and consequences to be very sever. Create a mission statement, code of conduct, school-wide rules, and a bullying reporting system. These establish a climate in which bullying is not acceptable. Disseminate and communicate widely.
5. Build a safe environment for students in the school. Establish a school culture of acceptance, tolerance and respect. Use staff meetings, assemblies, class and parent meetings, newsletters to families, the school website, and the student handbook to establish a positive climate at school. Reinforce positive social interactions and inclusiveness.
6. Train teachers and staff on the school’s rules and policies. Give them the skills to intervene consistently and appropriately.
7. Bullying is considered as behavior problems. So these behaviors require different prevention and response strategies that are suitable and effective. 
8. Set clear rules for behavior and monitor children's interactions carefully. Step in quickly to stop aggressive behavior or redirect it before it occurs.
9. Because of the low numbers of students who actually report incidents of bullying, teachers need to have a certain level of awareness that will thwart any potential problems. This awareness starts with understanding bullying.
10. Victims of bullying typically are physically smaller, more sensitive, unhappy, cautious, anxious, quiet, and withdrawn. They are often described as passive or submissive. Possessing these qualities make these individuals vulnerable to being victimized. So identify these characteristics in students and start some form of counseling or rapport building to intervene at the earliest.

Parents Role: 

Our children may not tell us that he or she is being bullied. However, we may notice some changes in his or her behavior. Children who were open and friendly who shared everything of what is happening in the school, suddenly stops telling anything serious and most of the times avoids talking about school matters. Find a quiet time to talk to your child. Ask him / her if something is wrong in the school or in studies. What help does him or her in need of? Explain that bullying is unacceptable and that no one should have to put up with it. Promise to do all you can to stop it. Make an appointment to see your child's class teacher as soon as possible. Decide what you want to say and what you'd like to achieve from the meeting before you go. Try to stay calm even though you may feel angry and emotional. Seek outside help from a specialist adviser if the bullying continues after you’ve identified the problem. Make sure your child understands that bullying is unacceptable. Encourage your child to be friendly, understanding and kind to others. By understanding and recognizing the different varieties of behaviour it helps to allow flexibility in the responses to the variations of the problem. Parents need to become aware the existing laws and policies of the school with regard to bullying and intimate to the school authority as soon as you come to know it. Don’t blame it on teachers or school management, it could lead to some other issues, take time to study and report it in an appropriate manner.

What Students need to know and do:

• Learn about what is bullying and become aware of it when you are bullied. 
• Talk to someone you trust. Encourage your friends if you find them that they are in need of help to seek help and advice.
• Identify and report to the teachers or counsellors that some form of bullying is taking place in the school premises. 
• Don’t become reactive, aggressive or passive. Take courage to face it and respond to it without hurting yourself. 
• Intervene immediately. It is ok to get another adult to help.
• Separate the children who are involved and protect them by being their friends.
• Make sure everyone is safe. Meet any immediate medical or mental health needs.
• Stay calm and undisturbed. Set model behaviors that can become an example for your friends to deal with this issue.
• Don’t be afraid of negative consequences. Report the matter at the earliest to the authority concerned or to parents. 
• Avoid these common mistakes: Don’t ignore it. Don’t think that your friend can work it out without adult help. Don’t talk to your friend who is involved in this in front of other children. Talk to him / her separately. 
• Don’t immediately try to sort out the facts and the differences and don’t make them to apologize or patch up relations on the spot. Be more open and talk to them with assertion that you are interested in the well being of your friends and that you want to help them to study well. 
• One thing that every student need to keep in mind is that they should not spread it among themselves. Gossips, rumors and other forms of bullying can bring problems rather than helping the individual. 
• Inform the authority concerned to take appropriate actions; don’t take the law into your hands. It is dangerous and harmful as students you are.

Recommendations: 

There exists in our educational institutions some forms of bullying from mild, moderate to severe. Let us not ignore the fact or undermine it. Start addressing these issues with promptness. Equip our faculty on bullying and its consequences on individuals especially on students. Teachers have to become more sensitive and sensible towards this problem. Appoint counselors who are trained and who could offer help and support to students. Parents, school staff, and other adults can help young children develop skills for getting along with others in age-appropriate ways. Bullying should not be viewed as an unfortunate but unavoidable part of school life. Children can form support groups among themselves with the guidance of the teachers and protect themselves and their friends from being bullied. Our society is in the process of transformation so these problems can creep into our schools and cause serious concern to our educational system. Law enforcing agencies need to become aware of this issue and help students when approached for help. Children are influenced by mass media so much that they like to try it out in their life. Teaching social skills and other relationship management in the school curriculum would bring ease to the students who undergo bullying.  

Conclusion: 

School bullying is pervasive and most children will probably experience it at some stage, either as a witness, a victim, or by being a bully themselves. Many researches on this topic agree that it happens across the world, though it can involve different behaviors and have different meanings in different places. Telling someone usually helps, but this does depend upon how well it is acted upon by the school.  Factors at both the individual and social level appear to be important causes of bullying. Family and peer relationships have been identified as important for children who bully, are victimized and are bully/victims. All three groups share some individual characteristics. Accepting the fact of existence of school bullying in our schools, the management need to equip and train them in handling this issue with care. It is possible to prevent it and monitor it when it occurs with timely and appropriate interventions.