Neichu Dz. Angami & Tushimenla Imlong
A serious emerging social concern needing urgent attention
Till recently, most of our perceptions about sexual overtures or assaults at the workplace were confined to stories read about in magazines or portrayed in films or TV serials – as something alien that takes place only in the metropolitan cities or in foreign countries, and that too, to individuals unknown to us. Today, it is turning out to be real life experiences of people living and working in Nagaland as much as it is prevailing in other parts of the world. It is shocking and deeply disturbing that this hidden and surreptitious practice, which may have already been in existence, is growing not only in size but in depth, causing huge pain and humiliation to many young adults, who are continually forced to stay silent and suffer in shame.
When gently prompted, people are beginning to reveal some of their horrendous experiences but with great fear of being found out. The trauma frequently revisits the victims as they are compelled to continue going to work and to pretend that nothing has happened, haunted by the fear that it could happen any time again. Often, colleagues, friends or even family members provide little or no support and instead turn around and re-enforce the blame on the victim by saying things like, ‘But you are very provocative’, ‘ The guy will not just do that, am sure you encouraged him’, or ‘You must have been sending out some signals’. Rubbish! Nobody encourages another to abuse their bodies and their beings. Sexual assault is not just about a man assaulting a woman for sexual pleasure. It could also be the other way round and also be against a person of the same sex. But in the context of Nagaland, the experiences we hear about are predominantly of a male colleague sexually assaulting a female colleague or subordinate.
Any act involving physical contact of a sexual nature without voluntary consent is considered to be sexual assault. It could also be of a verbal or visual nature or anything that forces a person to be subjected to unwanted sexual attention. Often the act of sexual assault becomes visible and draws public attention only when it is a confirmed case of rape. This is a real shame for a society that respects the dignity of every human life and upholds human rights and womanhood in its highest form.
There are many myths about sexual assaults that have been proven wrong by research all over the world. Most common myths are –
1. Women who are sexually assaulted “ask for it” by the way they dress or act – this idea is often used by offenders to rationalize their behavior. When a woman is sexually assaulted, it is not her fault.
2. Women lie about being sexually assaulted, often because they feel guilty about having sex – women rarely report being sexually assaulted. Sexual assault is vastly under-reported. So what we hear is only the tip of the iceberg.
3. Sexual assault is most often committed by strangers - Women face the greatest risk of sexual assault from men they know, not strangers, often these men are people they feel close to.
4. Men who sexually assault women are either mentally ill or sexually starved - Studies revealed that men who sexually assault women are “ordinary” and “normal” men who sexually assault women in order to assert power and control over them.
5. It’s only sexual assault if physical violence or force is used - Sexual assault is any unwanted act of a sexual nature imposed by one person upon another. It could range from unwanted sexual touching, to sexual violence resulting in wounding, maiming or endangering the life of the victim. Most sexual assaults are committed by a man known to the victim who is likely to use verbal pressure, tricks and/or threats during an assault. And often men promise favors to manipulate and convince the woman to agree to the act or keep it secret.
If we are committed to creating a caring community where every person’s worth and dignity is protected and nurtured, this emerging concern should become a serious and urgent issue for all of us to address collectively and even individually. We must bring to task responsible bodies and agencies to put their act together in order to ensure that offenders of such horrendous actions be brought to justice. Victims must not only be protected but empowered to seek and assert their rights and become champions rather than remain victims for the rest of their lives.
